Puffy's PA
A few weeks ago, I was offering my services as a Personal Assistant. That was tongue-in-cheek because I haven't got the personality to be an Assistant to anyone.
When I was about 20, I worked for a marketing company for three weeks. I was the personal assistant to Paul Switalski. He was young, good looking, ambitious, impatient and swore a lot and I didn't like him. The one blessing was the company allowed me to take home any item being marketed from soft drinks to handbags.
The week they were marketing a compact sewing kit, I was told to call an MD who ran the company who were selling the sewing kit. Paul Switalski asked me if I'd managed to get hold of this MD guy and I said I hadn't made the call yet. In a heavy Polish accent, Paul said to me f***** hell, what's wrong with you, don't you understand English, get him now, I want him now. I told you 10 minutes ago that I want him now. NOW! With that, I took off my shoes, put on my commuting trainers, picked up my bag and put on my coat. I retrieved the sewing kit which was given to me earlier on in the day, it was on the floor by the office door. I picked it up and turned to Mr Switalski and said this is for my mum and walked out. I never saw him again.
It's probably fabulous to have the glitterous, glamorous title of P. Diddy's assistant, but a man like Diddy might talk to me the same way Paul Switalski did and I'm not receptive to commands such as get me coffee now, get me the President of Vibe magazine like yesterday, order me a suit from Ozwald Boateng - you know my size and while you're at it, buy my girlfriend $10 million dollars worth of diamonds because I stood her up last night!
P. Diddy says it himself - [PA to me] "it's a hard mother*****g job, but somebody's gotta do it".
Well good luck to he or she. I can imagine that the hard work pays off for the right candidate. I actually admire P. Diddy. His drive and ambition got him to where he's at and where he wants to be, but you have to be cut from a certain kind of cloth to be a Personal Assistant to men the likes of P. Diddy or the Paul Switalski's of this world.
When I was about 20, I worked for a marketing company for three weeks. I was the personal assistant to Paul Switalski. He was young, good looking, ambitious, impatient and swore a lot and I didn't like him. The one blessing was the company allowed me to take home any item being marketed from soft drinks to handbags.
The week they were marketing a compact sewing kit, I was told to call an MD who ran the company who were selling the sewing kit. Paul Switalski asked me if I'd managed to get hold of this MD guy and I said I hadn't made the call yet. In a heavy Polish accent, Paul said to me f***** hell, what's wrong with you, don't you understand English, get him now, I want him now. I told you 10 minutes ago that I want him now. NOW! With that, I took off my shoes, put on my commuting trainers, picked up my bag and put on my coat. I retrieved the sewing kit which was given to me earlier on in the day, it was on the floor by the office door. I picked it up and turned to Mr Switalski and said this is for my mum and walked out. I never saw him again.
It's probably fabulous to have the glitterous, glamorous title of P. Diddy's assistant, but a man like Diddy might talk to me the same way Paul Switalski did and I'm not receptive to commands such as get me coffee now, get me the President of Vibe magazine like yesterday, order me a suit from Ozwald Boateng - you know my size and while you're at it, buy my girlfriend $10 million dollars worth of diamonds because I stood her up last night!
P. Diddy says it himself - [PA to me] "it's a hard mother*****g job, but somebody's gotta do it".
Well good luck to he or she. I can imagine that the hard work pays off for the right candidate. I actually admire P. Diddy. His drive and ambition got him to where he's at and where he wants to be, but you have to be cut from a certain kind of cloth to be a Personal Assistant to men the likes of P. Diddy or the Paul Switalski's of this world.
posted by August Mayfield at
00:34
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