Lady, you're too close - STEP BACK!!
I was standing in the queue at the supermarket today, minding my own business when I felt the hot breath of someone behind me. Even in a night-club, hot breath on back of neck isn't necessarily welcome unless I've had two Piña Colada's, a Long Island Ice Tea and three Margarita's.
I moved up a little bit so that the heavy breather wasn't invading my personal space but heavy breather saw this as a cue to move up too. The breathing was now replaced by body contact. I thought to myself can the person not feel that they're touching me which is wholly inappropriate. You don't form a queue and then press your body against the person in front of you; this is a forming a queue no-no. In fact, it's the opposite of queue etiquette. So I spun around and came face to face with a woman who didn't look me in the eye when I looked at her! She was
looking off somewhere in the distance as if she was totally oblivious to the fact that she was trying to cop a feel. OK, so she wasn't groping me, but she was breathing on me and touching me and if this were the office and she was a man, she'd be up for sexual harassment!
I looked at this crumpled face woman with Brillo Pad hair and dishevelled clothes and mean pink lines for lips. She wasn't even the type of woman who made me feel bi-curious. So even if I wanted to find out what it was like to be a lesbian for a day, she was no advertisement so she was wasting her time with all this touching and feeling business.
I gave her my loudest huff and my most animated shake-off and shuffled up in the queue a little bit more and stuck out my elbow just in case she didn't get the hint.
I can't believe I was violated by a crumpled old lady who took great pleasure in pretending she was doing nothing at all... wearing that "I'm completely innocent" look on her face. Dirty b*tch!! I know what she was up to, even if she wanted to play Miss Innocent.
I moved up a little bit so that the heavy breather wasn't invading my personal space but heavy breather saw this as a cue to move up too. The breathing was now replaced by body contact. I thought to myself can the person not feel that they're touching me which is wholly inappropriate. You don't form a queue and then press your body against the person in front of you; this is a forming a queue no-no. In fact, it's the opposite of queue etiquette. So I spun around and came face to face with a woman who didn't look me in the eye when I looked at her! She was
looking off somewhere in the distance as if she was totally oblivious to the fact that she was trying to cop a feel. OK, so she wasn't groping me, but she was breathing on me and touching me and if this were the office and she was a man, she'd be up for sexual harassment! I looked at this crumpled face woman with Brillo Pad hair and dishevelled clothes and mean pink lines for lips. She wasn't even the type of woman who made me feel bi-curious. So even if I wanted to find out what it was like to be a lesbian for a day, she was no advertisement so she was wasting her time with all this touching and feeling business.
I gave her my loudest huff and my most animated shake-off and shuffled up in the queue a little bit more and stuck out my elbow just in case she didn't get the hint.
I can't believe I was violated by a crumpled old lady who took great pleasure in pretending she was doing nothing at all... wearing that "I'm completely innocent" look on her face. Dirty b*tch!! I know what she was up to, even if she wanted to play Miss Innocent.
posted by August Mayfield at
19:53
3 Comments:
Maybe it was Gillian McKeith, trying to get a feel of your bumper.
Sistren August,
Did you consider that maybe instead of indulging in a sexual fantasy, the "crumpled face woman with brillo pad hair" was just desperately hungry for the warmth of a human touch?
Many homeless and mentally challenged folks never feel a loving touch from another human being. If they are touched at all, it is often by rough, uncaring, authoritative, administrative hands.
Yes, it is creepy to be touched by someone we don't know and didn't invite the touch from. Just please don't assume all uninvited touches are sexual in nature. Some are just an intense longing to make a human connection.
I pray that the crumpled face woman finds peace.
Just another way of looking at it.
Bless Up,
Lady Roots
Hello Lady Roots
My comments about Crumpled Lady were all very tongue-in-cheek!
I do understand that she may have been looking for the milk of human kindness, but on this occasion, I put a humourous slant on my feelings of being touched by a stranger.
But I appreciate your comments.
Thanks for sharing.
August
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